Infect

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Linkin Park - Numb
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I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I've becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I've becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

And I know
I may end up failing too
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I've becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Is everything what you want me to be
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Is everything what you want me to be..

Meteora. Not bad, though not as spirited as Hybrid Theory. A lot harder and more depressing though.. Anyway.. this song just kept playing in my head. It's just what reminds me of my school. I know I shouldn't be complaining about that.. but I feel some deranged compulsion to do so. Day after day, it eats at me, and even when I'm in the sanctuary of my home, there it is, waiting to pounce like a vicious guilt. I'm.. not well.

My body is sore every moment of everyday, and since you last heard of me, my chronic headaches are becoming more frequent, and also more painful. Insomnia is also a frequent visitor, and it's making everyday harder than it has to be. For those of you who don't know.. my school works different from pretty much any other high school in the world. It in essence, works like a university or college..

I'm infected with stress, and thankfully.. I have some hope to hold on to. The hope that can only be provided by my significant other, the one I love so very much.. I love you, Jessica.. and thank you, for all you've done, for all you want to do. I'll persevere, not for myself, but for her. I have to.